Breaking through the illusion of the mortal world

Chapter 50 A Young Man's Thoughts

The afterglow of the setting sun bathed the debating platform in a serene twilight.

The first day of competition has ended, and the list of 200 finalists has been finalized. Some are overjoyed, while others are dejected.

Many others, filled with anticipation and a sense of importance for tomorrow's fierce battle, returned to their respective peaks to seize the last moments for cultivation or to review the day's gains and losses.

Lu Ming returned alone to the familiar waterfall at Tianyan Peak.

The roar of the water continued, and the splashing water droplets reflected the golden light in the setting sun.

He sat cross-legged on the smooth bluestone that had been washed by the water, trying to let the cold water vapor and deafening roar cleanse the turmoil in his heart.

The Nine Revolutions Profound Technique slowly circulated within the body, and pure spiritual energy flowed through the meridians, nourishing the foundation of one's Dao.

In his mind, the scenes of today's competitions flashed by, especially Nangong Yu's raging Crimson Flame Bow.

As Xia Yufei's ethereal and unpredictable swordsmanship and Shui Ling'er's ever-changing flowing ribbons flashed by, he carefully analyzed their intricacies and pondered countermeasures.

His sparring experience with his senior brother Mo Yuan allowed him to see more clearly the spiritual energy flow and artistic conception behind many moves and spells.

However, whenever his thoughts were momentarily free, another image would uncontrollably surface—Hu Zhen's focused and resolute profile on the arena, her brows furrowing slightly as she was scratched by the aftershocks of the sword energy.

And... Senior Brother Mu Chen appeared by her side immediately, with that natural and familiar expression of concern.

His heart could no longer remain calm.

"How badly is she injured? Is she still in pain?" This thought kept gnawing at his mind, causing his spiritual energy to become slightly sluggish.

The bitterness and helplessness that I had forcibly suppressed during the day, now spread out like mist when I was alone.

Lu Ming was still worried.

As night deepened, the moonlight, like a ribbon, spilled across the tranquil mountains.

Lu Ming took a deep breath and suddenly stood up from the bluestone.

He made up his mind that he would go to Baicaofeng to take a look, no matter what.

Even if it's just to confirm she's alright from afar, even if it's just a simple greeting.

Instead of using his sword, he relied on his lightness technique and familiarity with the terrain to silently arrive at the territory of Baicao Peak in a few leaps and bounds through the moonlit forest.

A rich, fresh scent of grass and trees wafts through the air, and Baicao Peak is even more tranquil at night, with only a few nocturnal insects chirping softly.

He avoided the main road where disciples might patrol, and relied on his memory to sneak towards the area where Hu Zhen lived.

My heartbeat quickened unconsciously, a mixture of slight anticipation at the possibility of seeing her and a sense of trepidation akin to the feeling of returning home with trepidation.

Just as he approached the exquisite courtyard built along the stream, not far ahead, on a small white jade bridge spanning the stream, two familiar figures, reflected in the bright moonlight, came into his view clearly.

It was Hu Zhen and Mu Chen.

Hu Zhen changed out of the dusty robes she wore after a day of competition and into a light green casual outfit. Her long hair cascaded down her back and shone softly in the moonlight.

She leaned against the bridge railing, tilting her head slightly to look at the bright moon in the sky; her profile was soft and serene.

Mu Chen stood a step behind her, also gazing at the moonlight, a warm smile on his lips, as he whispered something.

From a distance, Lu Ming couldn't hear the specific words, but the atmosphere was like the flowing stream and the cascading moonlight—tranquil and harmonious, even carrying a tacit understanding that didn't allow outsiders to intrude.

The moonlight stretched their shadows long, intertwining them on the bridge surface.

Hu Zhen seemed amused by Mu Chen's words and chuckled softly, her shoulders trembling slightly. Her laughter was like a night breeze rustling through a wind chime, clear and melodious.

Mu Chen looked at her, his admiration and tenderness evident in the moonlight.

Lu Ming's steps froze on the spot as he hid behind a clump of lush moon bamboo.

All my courage vanished without a trace the moment I saw this scene, like a balloon punctured by a needle.

The moonlight illuminated everything, but it couldn't reach the boy's heart.

He watched her smile at others, watched others stand beside her, so naturally, so... well-matched.

What am I to you now? An untimely intruder? An unwanted show of concern?

A chilling, astringent feeling spread from the depths of his heart, instantly freezing his limbs and bones.

He stood there silently.

All the previous worries and struggles now seem so ridiculous and wishful thinking.

He didn't go any further, but just took a deep look at the scene on the bridge that he found both incredibly jarring and incredibly harmonious.

Then, without a sound, they turned around and retreated step by step along the path they had come from.

My steps were a thousand times heavier than when I came.

Instead of returning to his own courtyard, he came to the waterfall once again.

At night, the waterfall's roar seems even more deafening, and the spray carries a bone-chilling coolness.

He sat alone on the cold blue stone, looking up at the lonely moon in the sky, his heart filled with emptiness.

The victory achieved during the day on the debating platform now seemed to have lost all meaning.

The yearning for the land of immortals and the pursuit of a higher realm seem to have been shrouded in a shadow.

A sense of loneliness, like the icy waterfall, chilled him to the bone.

Why can I charge forward with unstoppable sword energy when facing a powerful enemy?

Why am I so timid and pathetic when faced with this feeling that is quietly growing in my heart, without even having the courage to go up and ask if I am hurt?

A young person's thoughts are heavier than mountains, yet confined to a small space.

"Hey, instead of sleeping at night, you're here gazing at the moon, trying to be sophisticated?" A slightly mocking voice rang out from behind, breaking the silence of the night.

Lu Ming didn't turn around, but he knew who it was.

Zhao Ling, carrying a wine jar, sauntered over to him, sat down without any ceremony, and shoved the wine jar into his arms.

"Here you go. Do you know what this wine is also called? It's also known as the Forget-Worry King. This is my treasured wine, and it's a cure for all kinds of insomnia and overthinking."

After saying this, Zhao Ling took a sip and began to recite a poem to the moon: "I send my thoughts to the wild geese flying towards Wangshu, but the wild geese fly far and wide, their light cannot reach me. I raise my cup in a hazy dream to forget my worries, but you do not understand my sorrows, my eyes are blurred."

Lu Ming held the wine jar without moving, silently savoring his senior brother's poem. He liked the imagery of the poem very much, but he couldn't fully understand it yet.

"Senior brother, what do 'wild geese' and 'Wang Shu' mean? Do they have other connotations like 'Forget-Worry Lord'?" Lu Ming asked his senior brother Zhao Ling.

Zhao Ling glanced at him, then tilted her head back and took another gulp, sighing as she said, "You, it's obvious you didn't study hard when you were young. The wild goose symbolizes longing, and the moon is called Wangshu."

Only now did Lu Ming fully understand the meaning of the poem. He tilted his head back, took a sip of wine, and said, "Senior brother, you know so much. This poem is also very beautiful."

Zhao Ling chuckled and replied, "That's right." Then she nudged Lu Ming with her elbow: "What? You saw that?"

Lu Ming stiffened slightly and remained silent, which could be considered as acquiescence.

"Hey, I knew it." Zhao Ling sneered. "I guessed it from the way you looked so lost on the Dao Discussion Platform."

"What, do you think that Senior Brother Mu Chen is so charming, has such profound cultivation, and is also a fellow disciple from the same peak, giving you an advantage, while you have no chance?"

Lu Ming pursed his lips and remained silent.

"Silly boy." Zhao Ling sighed, her tone less joking and more serious, "You just overcomplicate things."

Liking someone is like cultivating yourself or battling with someone; you have to look to your heart and figure out what you really want.

"Do you want to become her Daoist partner and live happily ever after? Or do you just want to see her doing well and protect her peace and happiness?" Zhao Ling took another swig of wine, her gaze fixed on the roaring waterfall.

"If it's the former, then your current cowardly attitude won't do. You don't even dare to say a word. Do you expect the girl to come to you? If it's the latter..."

He paused, turned to look at Lu Ming, and said, "Now that she has someone to care for her and look after her, and her injuries are minor, shouldn't you be happy for her? What are you complaining about here for?"

Lu Ming suddenly raised his head and looked at Zhao Ling.

Zhao Ling's words were like a key, suddenly unlocking the tangled mess in his heart.

"The path of cultivation is long. A wavering mind is a great taboo."

Zhao Ling patted his shoulder and said, "When it comes to matters of the heart, it's all about fate. You can't force it, but you can't run away from it either. You're not one of those people who cultivates the Supreme Way of Forgetting Emotions."

What you need to do now is not to doubt yourself, but to become the best version of yourself. Become stronger, strong enough to face any challenge, whether in the ring or... in your heart.

"When you can truly face your own feelings honestly and have the power to protect everything you want to protect, many things will naturally have an answer."

"Now... let's drink! A good drink can wash away all our troubles! We still have to fight in the arena tomorrow, don't embarrass Tianyan Peak!"

Lu Ming looked at the swaying wine in his arms, then looked up at the cold, bright moon, Zhao Ling's words echoing in his mind.

After a long while, he raised the wine jar, tilted his head back, and took a big gulp.

The spicy liquor burned down my throat like flames, but also dispelled some of the chill.

After drinking half a jar of wine, Zhao Ling's eyes became somewhat hazy, and she looked gentle.

Zhao Ling gazed at the moon, seemingly speaking to Lu Ming, yet also to herself: "The first person you secretly love in your life should be yourself. Write poems for yourself, have a conversation with yourself, quiet down in a space, listen to your own heartbeat and breath, and I believe that when this life goes out into the world, you won't be flustered."

"In the process of having a crush, I gradually revealed my best side. Sometimes I would stand under the green grass and flowers for no reason, staring blankly, and begin to want to know what life is."

Lu Ming was still confused, but the heavy sense of powerlessness seemed to have been somewhat eased by the wine and his senior brother's words.

Yes, first, focus on improving yourself. Become stronger.